(Read: Michael! and "I Want My Order On Time.)
Lowering his voice a few octaves, Dylan McQueen stated, "Stop playing, boy! I'm not going to tell you anymore!" He wanted to use his "daddy" voice on his teenage son, Michael; so he would know that he mean business. Dylan thought that Michael was getting too strong and playful to wrestle with and was looking for a way to quickly end their weekly wrestling match. His wife, Janelle, sat on the floor near the sofa wrapping presents that she received as payback from Dolores Claiborne. She was practically oblivious to her husband and son wrestling a few feet from her on their spacious family room floor.
As Michael released the wrestling hold from his father and giving him a gentle embrace; the ringing of the land line phone brought Dylan a sweet and wonderful relief. Rushing to study the caller ID, Michael announced to his parents, "It's your Aunt Rose, Dad. Want me to answer it?"
"Yeah, put her on speaker phone. This should be interesting," Dylan replied as he sat on the sofa near Janelle. He whispered, "Buddy is getting too strong to play with, now." She released a soft laugh and continued her wrapping.
Pressing the speaker button on the land line phone, Michael stated, "Hey Aunt Rose!"
"Hey! Is this Dylan Michael?" Aunt Rose asked. She took a gulp of vodka while she waited for an answer.
"Yes ma'am. But, everyone calls me, 'Michael'. Dad calls me 'Buddy.'"
Shaking her glass of vodka-on-the-rocks, Aunt Rose continued, "I know, baby. I like calling you 'Dylan Michael.' Are you playing any sports?"
"Yes, ma'am. I'm on the swim and softball teams."
Aunt Rose replied, "That's wonderful. I'm going to have to come see you swim and play ball." She then asked, "Is your Momma home?"
Turning his attention toward Janelle, she shook her head in the negative and mouthed the word, "No!"
"No, ma'am. She's gone shopping."
"Oh," Aunt Rose stated as she took another gulp of vodka. "What about my favorite nephew - your Daddy? Is he out playing poker?"
"No, Dad plays poker on tomorrow night. And he's right here." Michael shouted, "Dad! Aunt Rose is on the phone!"
"Thanks, Buddy. You didn't have to shout. I'm sitting right here." Dylan directed his attention toward the phone and said, "Hey, Aunt Rose" while Michael decided to answer his text messages.
She answered, "Hi sweetheart! You are my favorite nephew. I miss you." Aunt Rose swirled the ice cubes in her glass as she waited for a response.
"I miss you, too. Hopefully, I'll see you in a couple of days." Dylan thought, "Last week, she told my brother that he was her favorite nephew."
"I hope so," she stated, releasing a hiccup. Continuing to savor her vodka-on-the-rocks, Aunt Rose announced, "Walter and I are going next door to Samantha and Roger Brewer's house for dinner on tomorrow. I hope they turn on the lights. Roger is trying to conserve electricity. One night, Samantha stood naked in the living room lotioning herself with the curtains wide open so she could get some light from the street lights. I'd hate to take a flashlight over there. Who wants to eat in the dark? Plus, they don't drink."
"Ohhhhh, okay. Have you been drinking?"
"No, I'm still drinking. I just wanted to call and wish you and your lovely family a Happy Easter."
Puzzled, Dylan replied, "Happy Easter?"
"Oh hell, Happy Thanksgiving."
"Thanksgiving?" Dylan asked much to his wife and son's amusement.
"New Year's? Which holiday is it?" Aunt Rose asked with another hiccup.
Somewhere in the background, Walter, Rose's husband of forty years shouted, "It's Christmas, woman! It's Christmas!"
"That's right! Christmas!" Aunt Rose stated. "Merry Christmas to you, Dylan."
"And a Merry Christmas to you!" he replied.
Merry Christmas to each and everyone one of you!
Until next week...keep praising His name!
The Victims of Sandy Hook Elementary School
Newtown, Connecticut - USA